Find the Love You Deserve
BY LEARNING HOW TO WIN THE DATING GAME
How to Get Unstuck
Sometimes I get stuck.
Literally, like in this fab photo with a tight dress and my big shoulders in a tiny dressing room drenched in bad lighting.
But figuratively, sometimes I just get stuck in a rut of my own world. Feeling like I’m running a solo show and trying to sort everything out myself. As an entrepreneur it’s totally normal to feel overwhelmed like you’ve got a closet full of hats and you’re constantly changing them but at times I don’t really know which ones look or feel right!
Same thing goes with the single mom life.
Like the Berenstain Bears book, “Old Hat New Hat” where Brother Bear is trying on every hat available and making himself nuts trying to find a new hat. You run around with the kids, your job, handling a crisis or driving carpools, and making sure to plan around everyone’s fun and personal needs and then realize you’re tired, somehow missing your keys again and haven’t even had your own lunch yet! What the heck kind of hat do you need for that? A huge one with a secret pocket for your keys (and maybe a wine glass?).
But here’s what we can learn from Brother Bear. He’s not afraid to put on the goofy hat, bumpy hat, lumpy hat, frilly hat – until he finds the perfect one.
So I explored this concept as I was feeling stuck the other day and realized that i didn’t need a new hat. I just had to look in the mirror with the old hat (MY hat) and change HOW I was wearing it.
It’s ok to admit something’s not jiving and you’re feeling down or frustrated about it, but the key is to CHOOSE to get unstuck and not let it hold you back from your own amazingness.
Want some ideas? Here are a few from my own personal hat collection:
I’m a chicken and broccoli quick fix dinner kinda girl and by no surprise, I hear sighs and ughs at home about this from my teens. I realized the issue wasn’t the ingredients but the monotonous way I was cooking them.
I decided to surprise them by taking the SAME chicken and broccoli and putting it into muffin tins with wonton wrapper bottoms, topped with some cheese and baked it up for a delicious (and crazy simple) meal that literally used almost the exact same stuff as I was serving before. I listened to their needs (complaints) and instead of feeling badly about myself for not being the awesome Betty Crocker mom with loads of time to cook all day, I just looked at it differently thru their eyes.
The food was good but I just needed to make it more FUN. Seriously, they were good. I’ve decided everything is better in a wonton skin.
OK, this is serious ladies. I’m a former wardrobe stylist turned mom turned relationship coach that basically wears spandex and flip flops as my job. Ok, not my real job but if someone would pay me for it I’d be so appreciative! (Hey, Kate Hudson…call me?)
But as good as I am at rocking the athleisure fashion, I’m definitely in need of a fashion boost some days to feel vibrant, confident and shine brightly as I tackle the world with my superpowers! My fix: find ONE item that you can update in your closet and grab three new pieces. For example, I love basic t-shirts and comfy jeans.
So instead of throwing down the big bucks on new jeans and tops, I scored three new discount designer t-shirts (love me some Marshalls!) that freshened up my look for literally $20 total cost! Small tweaks can make big shifts in how you look and feel.
Wah Wah Workout
I’m embarrassed to say I haven’t worked out in about 6 weeks now. And while that’s not totally insane, it’s a tough admission from a woman that’s spent the last 3 years training at competitive level in the sport of weightlifting. The truth is that I didn’t define (nor train) as an athlete until I got a divorce. I’ll save that story for another blog post, but over the last 8 years I’ve prided myself on my commitment to fitness and wellness and shared this passion with most everyone around me including my kids.
Recently, when things got cray cray with more priorities than I could juggle, I moved the workout routine to the side. Ok, it was totally out of the picture. In hindsight, that was just me being stubborn. Instead of crying over my lonely barbell, and the athlete I “used to be”, I decided to get outside and just move! This new acceptance brought me back to truly appreciating the beauty of nature and all that it does to provide wellness to my body, mind and soul. I may not be lifting heavy things (aside from my full glass of wine in the evening) but an hour long stroll with my headphones by the beach gives me so much more right now than a sweat session at the gym.
So, what are you waiting for? Embrace the new routine, grab your headphones and just GO!
So here’s my question to you:
What ONE THING can you DO today to get UNSTUCK from something in your life?
And BTW ladies, you’re not alone.
Guaranteed your friend that you think has it all together is probably crying over her boring yoga pants and broccoli dinner too, so shoot her a message and say HEY. Tell her you’re stuck too and help each other get unstuck. Stick together but don’t feel sticky. Stick to your priorities but don’t let them stick to you. Ok, I tried…too many sticky cliches.
And in the case of my dressing room debacle, I was actually really stuck and had to ask (yell) for a store associate to come help me out. Yep, classy. And no, I did not buy that dress.
Note: I’ll write a follow-up on this same topic soon about getting UNSTUCK in your RELATIONSHIPS, so stay tuned for those juicy nuggets!
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